Jack | 3 Months

Last Monday Jack turned 3 months old! 

This month brought about a much more alert and smiley little man and has been so much fun! 

3 month old Jack loves...

mommy's funny faces

talking up a storm

Huckleberry

his lamaze peacock

bath time!

the ceiling fan

diaper changing time

and (surprisingly) tummy time

 2 month old Jack dislikes...

being put down

his car seat

naps

Health: No wellness check up this month so I'm not sure how much he weighs, but I'm guessing about 15lbs (up a 1/2 lb from last month?). He is still in size 2 diapers and 3-6 month clothes.

Breastfeeding: Jack and I are no longer nursing with the nipple shield and I'm happy to say I haven't had any bouts of mastitis since kicking it! I am so thrilled about that! I can honestly say I enjoy our nursing sessions, whereas just 4 or so weeks ago I was in tears with almost every feeding. I am still taking a Lecithin and Echinacea supplement 2x a day, but I really feel like losing the shield is what made all the difference. Jack has gone from eating about 17 times a day to about 6 to 8. He is still a big eater (hence those rolls!), but 6-8 feedings is much more manageable for this momma than 17!

Sleeping: At 6 weeks we implemented a bedtime routine starting around 6 every night. It's basically bath-book-boob-bed ;) (Although, right now the "book" is actually singing since he's too young for books to hold his attention. But alliteration is fun.) It has worked for us since the first day we started doing that and we're still going strong. He goes down around 7 and wakes up at 6-6:30. He wakes once to nurse around 3 or 4 in the morning but immediately goes back to sleep when he's done. For the first 6 weeks Jack slept exclusively in bed with me. Now I put him down for the night in his pack-n-play (which, btw, he just graduated out of the bassinet portion of the pack-n-play :( slow down that growing, baby boy!) while I spend the rest of my evening with Steven. But when I'm ready for bed for the night I pick him up and put him in bed beside me.

...I know, I know. Some of you probably think that's crazy but I can't get enough of this little boy. I know he is safe sleeping a foot away from me in his pack-n-play but I just can't stand it. I want to snuggle up with him all night. Not to mention, it makes the early morning feeding so much easier! I don't even have to sit up and it's awesome. He just latches and then drifts back to sleep once he's done. Easy peasy.

Some people believe co-sleeping isn't safe, while I know others just think it is a nuisance, but it really works for us and has from the very beginning. I feel so bonded sleeping with my little man all night. I love waking up nose to nose with him and seeing his gummy grin first thing in the morning. It just melts my heart. I honestly don't see our sleeping arrangement changing any time soon.

Naps are another story... let's not discuss naps. This kid is a great night sleeper... But not such a great napper.

Nicknames: I've noticed this past month that we have a lot of nicknames for Jack. Mostly, Steven and I refer to him as Little Man, but he is also Baby Bear, Jack Attack, and Jack Jack. It's ridiculous. I know.

New this Month: This month Jack has discover his hands! Hands that are a part of his body! Hands that can conveniently go right in his mouth whenever he wants! Hands! Such a magical thing, those hands. He is also a pro at tummy time now. He laughs and smiles the entire time and is just so strong! Speaking of laughing... he does it all the time and it's enough to make my heart burst! Oh yeah, this kid also decided to roll from tummy to back this month! (stop growing, Jack. just stop it) He has discovered that he can stand up tall with a little help from mommy or daddy and thinks that's a lot of fun, too. He also has discovered Huckleberry and loves to stare at him. He follows him with his eyes whenever he leaves the room. He's also working on those fine motor skills and has been practicing grasping his toys.

 I really love this stage and have been having the best time with my little man!

I'll tell ya, this little boy and I... we have a full blown love affair going on.
Steven and I are just smitten. We simply can't get enough.

Happy 3 months, Jack Jack! Mommy and Daddy love you so, so much!  

Happy Birthday, Steven!

I love --LOVE-- birthdays! 

And today Steven turns 27. 

He isn't a big fan of his birthday (which I will never understand), so we just celebrated last night with a simple and delicious strawberry cake (quite the downgrade from last year's cake!) and opened a few gifts. Tonight we plan on heading out for pizza with a few close friends.

Steven is all about no birthday fuss. (Now for my birthday.. we make a fuss.)

But this birthday was especially sweet because of our little man. I almost teared up taking pictures of him sitting on his daddy knee. Goodness those two... I love them so much.

(recipe)

So happy birthday to the most loving, generous, hardworking man I know. Thank you for being such an amazing husband to me on my good days and bad. And thank you for being the best father imaginable to our little Jack. I know this next year is going to be full of many great memories of our little family. So here's to your 27th! May it be the best yet. 

I love you!

Love, your beautiful wife 

who expects lots of gifts on her birthday and a much larger cake.

Happy Mother's Day

Happy Mother's Day out there to all you mommas! 

Especially my lovely mom. I love you and wish we could spend the day together! 

And thank you Jack for making me a momma. You are my pride and joy and I feel so honored to be chosen to raise you. I love you, little man.

 Jack is way more interested in Huckleberry than the camera! Check those chubby cheeks!

Today is a pretty bittersweet day for me. It's an amazing feeling to be celebrating mother's day for the first time with my little family, but today also marks my last day of maternity leave. Tomorrow I have to start working again and my heart aches at the thought of it. I'm one of the lucky ones. I have an amazing and understanding boss who is allowing me to work from home, part-time for the next 5 weeks until my mother gets here to babysit Jack for a month. After that month, Jack will be going to a good friend of mine's for daycare. 

Even though I'll still be with him everyday, all day for the time being, (I'll only be working 8-12 from home while the lady who has been taking over for me during my leave is staying on to take the afternoon shift), I still can't help but feel as though my world is spinning out of control. I hate the thought of having to split my energy and time between him and work. And worse yet, I feel like everyday is a countdown to June 16th-- when I'll be heading back to work full-time. Steven and I have cut our budget, downsized, and re-prioritized and reconsolidated debts but there is just no way around it. We can't keep this roof over our head on one income. 

I've went through many emotionally phases these last 3 months. I've cried myself to hysterics, I've been angry and jealous at each and every stay at home mom, and I've felt immense guilt over the thought of leaving little Jack only to spend my days behind a desk. I know I'm going to struggling finding joy and fulfillment in my job outside the home, which is sad. I once really, really loved my job. 

I really don't understand God's timing with all of this, but I trust that He has a plan giving us Jack a few years earlier than we were financially prepared for. And I know that through this I will have to rely on Him for strength emotionally. Jack will adapt to time away from his momma just fine, it's my heart that's going to go through the ringer. 

I'm blessed to have a great boss, a mom willing to fly across the country and be with her grand boy for a month while I adjust to the separation, and an amazing friend who is like-minded and will be the best secondary primary caregiver I could have asked for for Jack. I truly am blessed, yet I still couldn't find the strength to get through this post without tears. I'm kinda an emotional wreck. 

Thanks for letting me vent and put a damper on this Mother's Day. And thanks for returning to this neglected space day after day. I'd appreciate prayers as I navigate through this adjustment. I really just want to be the best mommy I can be to my little man.

So happy Mother's Day to all you mommas. Working moms, stay at home moms, empty nesters, and each and everyone in between. I hope your day is filled with love.

Huck, Pure Gold

I've learned some really important things these last 11 weeks.. like how to trust my instincts and how to distinguish Jack's needs based on his type of cry, how to function on a ridiculously small amount of sleep and how to change a diaper before having my first cup of coffee. All very important things, of course. But another thing I've learned is that, hands down, I have the best dog a girl could have.

Since the day we brought Jack home, Huck has been the most well behaved, oversized pup imaginable. No jealousy nor aggression (although I didn't expect that to begin with) that some people warn you about. He hasn't been acting out or having accidents in the home or displaying any behavior that shows he is less than happy with our family's newest addition. And man, I just freaking love my dog!

I love when he shows an interest in Jack, licking his feet or simply just laying close to him every opportunity he gets. I love when Jack sees Hucks tail wagging a mile a minute and then cries out when Huck moves away wondering where the pretty, golden fluff went off to. I can't wait for the day when Jack is toddling behind Huck all over the place. I have a feeling these two will truly be the best of friends.

The only negative concerning Jack's arrival for Huck has been some weight gain. We had the rainiest March ever here! (Like seriously, records were broken and all that jazz.) Poor Huck didn't get his usual daily walks, and well... he may have added a few extra pounds to his midsection. Baby weight, I tell ya, it effects the entire household apparently. 

But overall, Huck is doing great and I couldn't love that spoiled pup more. He really is the best big brother Jack could have asked for and I feel so lucky to have the sweetest Golden imaginable. 

"Can I lick him, ma? Can I? Can I?"